#367 - Busy Busy

Life has been crazy and work is getting nutzo! I took a few days to relax so now it's back at it. Like I say I must be really wicked since they say there is no rest for the wicked!

KIDDO/CHRISTMAS NOTES

This one is dedicated to HOPE... hope that things will change for those still suffering through infertility.

5 Years ago if anyone had of told me that we would have an amazing Christmas like we just had I would have probably wanted to slug and or mame that person. I can't believe how much things have changed. We went from feeling so sad at Christmas to truly enjoying it over the last few years.

Christmas Eve was spent baking with the kids, talking to Elfie, our elf on the shelf and generally getting ready for the big guy in the red suit. We even took a moment to walk around the yard with the kids and we delivered a Christmas Card and some home made Nuts 'N Bolts to our neighbour (they have been married for 25 years plus, no kids... hmmm I wonder?). I even managed to get some family pics out in the snow at night.

Christmas Morning was that of a dream, you know the one you have before you have children... The one you dream of while torturing yourself going through infertility treatments, you know the one I mean if you have been unfortunate enough to have been there done that.

We made the kids wait in their room before they came out. We had the cameras and video cameras ready to go! They came out and walked right past their Santa Gifts. Didn't even see them! Too funny! Then they quietly looked around and we had to 'clue' them in. No hyper craziness (I enjoyed that part! :) ) They were so wide eyed, especially Baby she was in a daze. The kids enjoyed their toys and opened one gift at a time. It took most of the day and we had supper at home so their was no rush. The kids were so good it was kind of scary! :) The evening finished off with 2 four yr olds boxing on the Wii... it was quite a hoot.

Dreams can come true...

Good night

Are you freaking serious!

So it just goes to show some people just don't get it... My kids Christmas gifts arrived from some relatives this weekend... well guess what they were in a bag from Thyme Maternity. Excuse me while I throw up! (My Aunt probably got something for my newly knocked up Cousin's daughter for Christmas and yippee I got the bag) She had to quit school because she got PG...

I feel like I have just been kicked in the gut....

#365 - Busy Busy

It was a busy day.... Trying to get ready for the family coming on Sunday. (What was I thinking!) Well at least my house will be clean and all the 'stuff' will be done before Christmas!

Today...
Get up, have breakfast, get the other 2 kids up
Make gingerbread houses (too much fun! Even Baby & Dad was right into it!)
Clean up mess
Clean 1 of 3 bathrooms (yuck)
Do Laundry
Have Lunch
Put Laundry away
Wrap presents
Work on checkered flags on boys wall (almost done)
Supper
Bake Lemon Cheese Squares
Cleaned up Kitchen
Clean up Toys (again! :) )

Yesterday there was more fun time with the kids... Colouring and making Christmas decorations. So pretty much my house isn't spotless and I don't care as I got to enjoy some quality time with my kiddos! It makes me happy that I have been able to work weird hours to stay home and have extra time with the kids!

Here is to new traditions...

All sorts of stuff!!

December is one of those bittersweet/emotional/wonderful/sad months...

... It takes me back to my child hood and Christmas's back then. My memories of grumpy parents where every gift was 'nice'... butttt. Oh and the mounds and mounds of toys I received and didn't even want.
... it reminds me of all the years there wasn't any gifts under the tree for that baby we so desperately wanted (94-04)
... it reminds me of our first visit to the IVF clinic which is/was 4 hours away (2003)
... it reminds me of the loss of my grandmother (Dec 12, 2003)
... it reminds me of the first time I heard the words 'Your Pregnant' (Dec 12, 2004) To be exact it was "It looks like you are Pregnant" (I wondered what the frig that meant at the time. I actually asked the nurse what "LOOKS LIKE" meant.)
... it reminds me of my first Christmas with my boys (2005)
... it reminds me of my first Christmas with my daughter (2007)
... it reminds me of moving to this crappy house (2007) and missing my old house and all the wonder decorations I had room for
... it reminds me of the first steps my daughter took (Dec 12, 2008)
and last but not least it reminds me of how lucky I am to have this wonderful family and that my Children are all healthy and happy

I wish everyone a Happy December and Hang in there if you are still in the trenches of infertility....


KIDDO NOTES
We have been a we bit sleep deprived around here. All three kids are sick. They seem to have the timing down so at least one of them is up at all times the last 3 nights. I am not sure how I am still functioning? I have been busy, between extended hours at work, painting the boys mural, Christmas cards and getting ready for a houseful on Sunday. I just hope I am not the next one to be sick!

I am looking forward to a reprieve in the weather. The highest we got to on Saturday was -30c (-22F) and Sunday morning it was -37c (-34.6F). We also set a record one night on the weekend of -46c (-50.8F). WOWSERS that's nasty... and no that is not regular temps for this part of the country! Thank goodness for remote starters is all I am saying!

Oh yes and Boy1 is learning to draw all sorts of cool things... He drew Bounce from Mrs. Spiders Sunny Patch. Had the big smiley face. The legs were coming out of the top instead of the bottom, but I thought it was pretty cool. (Not as cool as his first potato head that he drew, as they were laughing so hard it was hilarious. )

... tomorrow more cleaning.. yuck!

Good night

Goodnight

#362 - Yippe and a small tear!

Yippee! I was so excited that the last time I went out shopping I finally was able to get a hold of the new Always Infinity 'napkins'. I was lucky enough to be able to preview these and have been impatiently waiting for them to come to a store near me. Finally! Seriously who new feminine hygiene products would EVER make me happy?

So what else have I been up to? Still making Xmas gifts and I started painting the wall in my boys room and some unfinished walls in the basement. Am I freaking crazy? YES! I have changed my mind in the boys room. I am not doing just the checked black and white wall anymore. Now it's a grey border with a big white rectangle in the middle. The white rectangle is going to be stripped in the nascar logo colours and I am going to hand paint two waving checkered flags in the middle. I am going to get the rest of the paint tomorrow (even though I can't afford it! Bad me) I just want to get it all done! I promise I will post a pic when I am done (that's if it looks good that is!) Oh heck if it's crap I may even share as well!

I swear we have over a foot of snow on our lawn now! WOW there is a tonne of that crap out there! :) I do love it I must admit (good thing since I live in Winter Wonderland) however I do not like to drive in if the roads are bad.

KIDDO NOTES
So if you are wondering about the tears... I finally got Baby's first hair cut today. At 2 1/2 it's way past time! I can't believe it's my last first hair cut! It was a sad but good moment, she really needed a hair cut!

The kids did great as we were all Shaggy today. 5 hair cuts and 2 hours and they played really well for all that time. Don't worry they were rotten when they got home... they had to make up for it! :)

Good Night

#361 - Have you ever?

Well it was a FROSTY one today -19 C. I saw something I have never seen the in winter before, a Rainbow. It was way to frosty for water so it must have been an Icy rainbow? It was very cool! (We were in the car and Boy1 was talking about a rainbow, we thought he was 'seeing' things, apparently we weren't! :) )

Here is to about a foot and a half of snow in 2 days and some frosty weather... maybe now it's time to get that outdoor skating rink started? (I suppose that means I will have to buy some skates... I am sure that skating after all these years will be painful!)

Good night

#360 - Snow, string, and high pitched noise

Well today we woke up to snow, falling gently. By the end of the day we are talking 8 to 12 inches and drifts of 3 or 4 feet with the nasty wind! Now yes I live in Canada but this was a bad storm. Usually we don't get this much snow all at once. Well I was supposed to go to a meeting at the college that I teach at, so I called and let them know I was not coming in. No way I was driving in the snow with all the idiots on the roads around here! Winter comes EVERY year and still people have no idea how to slow down when the nasty roads hit. I also think if you did not grow up and learn to drive in this part of the country that you should have to take a winter driving lesson/test.

I also managed to sneak out of my other job tonight so I had the whole day off! Well then it lead me to some ADHD. My plans had changed and I didn't know what to do with myself. So what did I do, started a whole bunch of projects. Did I finish any? NO! :) So I started to 'dig' out my Christmas decorations (missing my old house again, had one cupboard just for xmas stuff and I didn't have to move a bunch of junk to get it out). I got my hubby (he's back to 4 days a week again... ugg) to hang some shelfs on a wall downstairs (for pictures) and I put up some of our stuff that has been waiting since we moved in to go up on the wall!

I dug out some Christmas gift stuff and thought about wrapping some (but that thought passed!) Then it was on to putting some stuff on the walls, then to my scrapbook, then to stamping, then to my computer to print out some calendars I made, then back to do some assembly on my calendars... ADHD much?

Speaking of calendars... I decided to make some nice calendars for the family. You know the ones that fit in CD cases. Well it seemed like a good idea at the time. 12 months times 6 calendars. Then I had to pre-cut each of them, then cut them with my smaller trimmer so that's 12*6*4*4... 1152 cuts... plus a few extra for touch ups. Then there was the CD cases I bought, they are missing the little clear piece on the bottom that holds the calendar in... so I am going to have to try and swap for some cases that I have stuff in. Sheesh so much for my in-expensive quick gifts! :)

So tomorrow I have to brave the roads and head into work. At least it should be fairly quiet out there!

KIDDO NOTES
Ahh yes the peace has ended and the screaming and fits have come back. Ohhh I didn't not miss those at all. Boy1 is embracing anger these days. Anything doesn't go his way he Screams so loud it's deafening. It is very hard to deal with as it really hits a nerve or 10! I am trying to stay calm as getting mad just makes it worse. But the little bugger has my stubbornness and will scream and scream and scream. He has gone back to flailing around too (greattt!) Tonight he screamed for 2 1/2 hours because he got cold water instead of room temperature water... I think I will be counting to 10 a lot (now if only I could get the other 2 to stop joining in with the screaming.

So Baby has joined in with the screaming now too... what's a parent to do? I know buy ear plugs until they grow out of it!

Then there is Boy2 and his moods... oh boy one never knows if he is going to be happy or pouting... it changes sometimes from second to second.

Please bring back my peace!!! :)

Ahhh yes and then there is string... Baby's mitts are going to be attached to one another next time we go out! So on Thursday I met hubby to do our shopping at the bit Walmart supercenter. When we got to the car one of Baby's mitts was missing. So hubby headed off with the kids and I went for a walk. Did I mention that it was a supercenter? Well I went and re-walked the entire store. I mentioned that it was a supercenter right? I retraced all our steps and I was moving. I even asked in a few departments if anyone found a little mitt. On my way out I stopped at customer service. Nothing, nadda, zip! No sign of the mitt (I got a lot of exercise though) Well as I was heading back out to the car, hubby called to let me know that he had found the mitt under Boy1's butt in the car seat. You are probably wondering why I was worried about one little mitt? Well my MIL knitted it, it is a cute little white one with pink trim. I just couldn't bear loosing one. So next time they are getting attached!

The trip to the supercenter wasn't a lot of fun (Except the money I spent! We needed some stuff and it got expensive... well at least my xmas shopping is done). When I met up with hubby the boys went off with him and the girl stayed with me. She was half asleep and just adorable. She was so good and we had so much fun shopping. Yet another one of those special moments.

night

#359 - Seriously?

Well I found out the 'rest' of the story this evening. I went to a scrapbooking retreat a few weekends ago and the HAG from the store was bad mouthing me to the owner. I think she was pissed off because I wasn't doing her job for her. Talk to the hand chicky poo! (oh ya and don't eff with me I am smarter than you and you won't win! Oh and did I mention I will eff with your mind if you keep the bs up! <- evil me speaking! :) )

I was thinking of confronting her but why bother. She is going to blame me for whatever she wants anyway. Oh well I might as well has some fun and mess with her head for a while! :) LOL I am sooo glad this is just a part time job.

With that I am off to bed

#358 - Lost

Why is that when I am not running around with my hair on fire and having too much to do that I just feel lost? It was kind of a lazy day today as I could not quite figure out what I wanted to work on. I had some time with the kids which was wonderful and I had some time to do a little bit of something/anything. So what did I do? Nothing! Well I guess I managed to get some laundry put away and a few things cleaned up in the 'computer cabinet from H E double hockey sticks (H*ll in case you were wondering)'. This evening I even managed to clean up some stuff in the kitchen and start working on the digital Calendars that I am making for Christmas. Hmm I guess I did more than I thought? I should have started dragging out my Xmas decorations or something though???

I always get lost when I am not way to busy... I wonder why that is?

INFERTILITY...
There must be something in the air? Maybe it's because this used to be such a sensitive time of year for me? I don't know? I have recently realized something though. I realized today that babies no longer bother me (YEY for healing); however pregnant women still get me in the gut so-to-speak. So this year we are spending time at home so we can have some family time and so that I can avoid my cousins Pregnant daughter (and all the gushing that goes with that).

I suppose after 11 years of eating/sleeping/breathing/praying/begging/being angry with regards to infertility a few short years is not enough time to have let it all go and just be part of the past. I suppose in someways it was such a part of our lives for so long that it has shaped me as I have grown, now I just have to move past the 'bad stuff'. I suppose I don't ever want to forget what I went through though as it was a very important part of my life. I want to use the strength and patience that I have gained from those days every day to deal with the things that are not so easy in life. I want to remember what NOT to say to others and I want to be able to support anyone that needs it.

HOPE....
I have hope... almost every blogger that I have followed has achieved the dream of parenthood in one way or another. Here is praying that our children never have to worry about infertility...

Good night