37 Weeks and hanging in there...

I know it's been WAY to long, so sorry!

I have been off work since April, and my Short Term Disability (STD) was declined. Luckily after appealing it was finally approved. They originally declined my STD as being in pain would not affect the baby and some discomfort during PG is to be expected. (Hmm I wonder how non-PG people get STD for back issues? It's only pain right? ) Anyway no more complaints as it is all worked out now, I could have done without the extra stress though.

As for the pain it has been pretty bad, being off work and not sitting for 8 to 10 hours a day in front of a computer has helped a little. (Needless to say I haven't been keeping up with updating my blog as it seems that sitting in front of the computer usually makes the pain worse)

My O.B. really doesn't know what to do with me. I guess I don't fit into the usual 'box'. I had a pretty severe bout of some kind of excruciating pain on the May long weekend (Victoria Day in Canada). It was so bad I went to the hospital. They had NO clue what to do with me. I think I would have been better going to a GP as it seems like if it doesn't involve the Uterus (in the Labour and Delivery dept) they really don't know what to do with you.

I was sent to a physiotherapist. I finally got my butt in for an appointment (I couldn't get an appt locally so I had a bit of a drive.. great), it's the best thing I think I could have done. She can't do much with me but she is quite concerned about my 'issues'. It was nice that someone finally realized that I am in some kind of bad shape, it's not just me going nuts. One thing that I found out that was interesting was that my sciatic pain that I have had for about 6 years is not actually sciatic nerve issues but muscle issues. Apparently my family dr. at the time misdiagnosed me. (Not to happy about the misdiagnoses as this could have been fixed years ago... arg... so much for my faith in the medical system!) Anyway I am glad to hear that something can be done about the pain that I am currently in and the supposed sciatic pain. I was told that if I don't come back for treatment after the baby that I would be in for life long problems as my ligaments and muscles in the pelvic area are pretty much 'letting' go, not great for the joints among other things. My husband was right I am actually falling apart! Anyway I will be glad to eventually put this all behind me.

Other than the pain it has been an uneventful PG, the best way to be, I am lucky for that. I am finding my inability to move around much to be somewhat annoying... but there is only two more weeks until my c-section so I am pretty sure I can hang on that long! It truly is a lot more comfortable only having one baby in there vs. two. (I have to be nice to my non-infertile friends that are PG and whining about discomfort, cause man there is no 'size wise' discomfort with one after you have had two at once! :) ) We had our last ultra-sound on Thursday and the Tech said everything looks great. It was good to hear that as I still need reassuring, although this PG has been a lot less stressful then my first IVF PG from that stand point.

I can't believe we are almost to the end of this PG. I will be sad to see it over in some ways as it will be my last. I am looking forward to moving past infertility. For the first time in a very long time it will be weird to not be thinking about it, not being treated for it, not being monitored for it... etc... I am not going to know what to do with all my spare time! :) I really am starting to feel like I am able to move on. I am so incredibly lucky to have come to this stage in my Infertility Journey. I never ever thought I would ever feel this way. I know that the Infertility issues will always be with me, but their sting and grip is finally starting to be a thing of the past. I wish this on all my IF sisters out there as it is truly a good place to be.

As for the boys, they have been awesome. I am still amazed every day by how much they change and that they are ours. I look at them with wonder most days. I can't imagine life without them now. They have been so good I am worried that when they hit 2 that we will be in trouble! They are starting to talk more and more and they also have their own language. We finally got them to say Bye and one of them decided Die was easier to say and was kind enough to teach his brother. (I don't think we will be working on them to say Bye at the door when people leave after a visit until we get that one straightened out! :) )

Unfortunately due to the pain part of my PG I am not able to play with them how I would like to. In the evenings though they each grab a toy and come and sit with me in the big chair and play. It makes me feel better to spend that time with them. I currently have to have someone in 5 days a week as lifting and even sitting with them during meals is very difficult or impossible. My mother is here 3 days... 3 days a week with crazy lady, good freaking thing I have happy PG hormones. I could go on for days about her annoying-ness but lets just say I need the help so I have to put up with it. (2 more weeks, 2 more weeks, 2 more weeks ugggg). I still have the lady that was looking after the boys when I was working here for 2 days a week. (I think she is half cloned with my mother, except with a harsh personality). She doesn't like it when I am around when she has the boys so I spend my days in the basement 'hiding'. It makes me sad as I would rather be with the boys. It annoys the crap out of me, but I can't stand being with her all day either so I just can't win (She is good to the boys, but we are very different people). Oh ya and she is way to 'motherly' for me. Every time I go to the O.B. she asks me if I took my pee with me (OMG never mind will you). Oh ya and I have asked her to come at 8:30 for 2 months (since the boys don't get up until 9am) and she kept coming at 7:30. Driving me crazy, I needed to get up at 7am just to be civil by the time she got here (I am no morning person!). I haven't been sleeping great so getting up that early when I don't need to is just CRAZY! Anyway last week I finally got her to come at 8:30 so now I can sleep/or lay in bed until 8am! YEY! Anyway I am lucky to have the help as I can't do it on my own right now. My dear husband is worked to the bone when he is home, I wish I could give him a break, but he is going to have to wait a bit longer too!

So I am at home most of the time and just waiting out my 2 weeks. We are ready for the new addition, we have a crib setup and the clothes are all put in the drawers and ready to go. (I wasn't ready when the boys came since they were early, so I have been busy getting my hubby to get everything ready). We even have the base of the car seat in the truck already. I finally got an outfit to bring baby home in too. (I thought it was going to be coming home in a diaper only! It is really hard to find something that is generic when you can't get out much!) Now all we need to do is wait......

Take care all