Clinic frustrations

Hey there, well it looks like things may be starting to go the right way in blog land. Stop over and check out Fly's photos. I sure hope we see more of that around here soon!

I would also like to thank Thalia for this interesting post, if I ever get lucky enough to get PG again I will keep this in mind, as the guilt thing has always bothered me. I just hope that some day we all have migrated to kid blogs instead of all these IF blogs. It makes my heart sad that so many are suffering.

Well I had a friend come over last night with her two kids, 3 and 10months old. So she knows about our fertility issues and our recent failed FET. So what does she say, ss her very undisciplined 3 year old terrorizes my house? "Aren't you glad your last cycle didn't work?" Are you freakiing kidding me? I didn't even have a good answer for that one, no quick comeback... just silence, lots of silence. Finally I just said NO I am not glad that it didn't work (eventhough your 3 year old seriously needs some discipline.) The whole time I am thinking that maybe if you followed through on your "no don't do that" maybe, just maybe he may be a little better. Just a hunch but I think the kid has her trained, he whines, she gives in? Pay now or Pay later seems to come to mind? Boy I don't want to be around during the later.

And this is why I have given up on any support from my friends that don't live in my computer! LOL!

IVF Thoughts
I think that I am really getting concerned with my clinic. I called the other day to check to see if they have been getting my paper work (I have had issues before so I thought I would be pro-active) and find out what the waiting list is like. I swear they would do better with trained monkeys than some of the people that answer the phones there. DAH hello you work in a Fertility clinic at least know more than I DO for FRICKS sakes!

So anyway back to my rant. I called left my message and waited for the clinic to call me back. I asked about my paperwork and it just went downhill from there. I wanted to check about my blood test results I told her that they won't have my u/s results yet. So what does she say? We don't have your u/s results... Knock knock anyone home, isn't that what I just said. So I figured I would cut her some slack maybe she didn't hear me correctly. She then said to me that they didn't have my FSH, oh wait maybe we do, but it's from way back in July (hmmm I only cycle once a month and given that it is just August chances are that's not from WAY back?) Then she said that they didn't have my hubbys S/A. I am just about to freak out as I called in May and asked if he needed one since it was scratched off the list I sent them, now we need one? WTF... Then she said if the dr. didn't want them then I guess it doesn't matter? I guess she didn't have a copy of the list. So finally I asked her about my FSH, I wondered what it was. She told me it was 5.7, so now it's been a while since I have been through a fresh cycle and I didn't really know those numbers the last time (newbie, didn't know what the heck I should know about anything back then). So I asked her if that was good, she didn't know. Yes a nurse at the Fertility clinic didn't know what good FSH was. So finally she said I think anything under 7 is OK. (It's pretty bad when dr. google and the girls in blog land know more!)

My next question was about the waiting list... big surprise she didn't know (gosh I hope this was a temp just filling in for the day). So I have no idea where I am in the wait list or when I could possibly get a call for a fresh cycle.

I no longer have any confidence with the clinic. I really am not sure if I really want them to be taking care of my precious eggs and our even more precious embryos. I wish they were not the only clinic around. I am so darn frustrated.

Quote of the day
We all carry around so much pain in our hearts. Love and pain and beauty. They all seem to go together like one little tidy confusing package. It's a messy business, life. It's hard to figure--full of surprises. Some good. Some bad.
Henry Bromel, Northern Exposure, The Big Kiss, 1991

Warning kids discussed
I now live in a gated community. The boys are certainly on the move since they started crawling so for their own safety we have put up the gates!

On another note, less than a month before I go back to work now. I would do anything to be a SAHM. It just seems that everything, living expense wise, keeps going up and going up and our wages don't go up. I live in an oil rich province that is booming, jobs everywhere, yet due to the cost of living we still aren't getting ahead. Did I mention that I live in an oil rich province yet our gasoline is around 5.22 a gallon?

I am Canadian and I am going to be taxed until I die and even when I die! LOL!

Take care