Thursday, March 09, 2006

Snowing again, the husband (chief cook and snow shovel-er) will be happy

It's snowing again! Wow I think we are getting our winters worth of snow in 4 snowfalls. We had 8 inches fall in about 2 hours a couple of days ago and now about an inch in the past hour! It is coming down like a heavy rain, I sure am glad I don't have to drive anywhere today!

FET Thoughts
Well its another day, I am still waiting, AF should be here sometime next week. Then it's off to the HSG! I am sure glad it's a quick one. I am debating if I should drive myself this time? Usually it wipes me out but I think I should be fine to drive. It is my third one so it's not like I don't know what to expect. It's only about a 45minute drive home so I think I can manage that.

Quote of the Day
How beautiful a day can be when kindness touches it. "
- George Alliston

Ok I have decided to change up my posting style. I have found that not only do I have to deal with my IF I also need a place to discuss my other part of my life that involves my kids. I have been avoiding discussing my kids pretty much but I really need a place to deal with transitioning from IF to parenthood as I don't think I have done that very well. So from no on if I have something to say I will add it to the bottom of my post so that way you can choose if you would like to read it or not. I will add my Warning at the bottom before I start instead of in the title of my posts as I have done before.

Warning Kids discussed below
As I mentioned above I am trying to transition from IF to parenthood. My twins are approaching 8 months so it is really about time. Going through another FET is not helping with this I suppose. I have joined a twin parents group, I still feel like such an outsider even though I do belong there. It is still strange to think of my boys as twins since they were created through IVF. Yes they are twins but really should they have been. I went to my meeting last night and one of the lady's is PG (They are everywhere, it's like an illness I just can't catch), one of the other gals leaned over and whispered to another gal that she has twins but they were from "IVF". I didn't catch the rest of the conversation, but I was totally annoyed that she referred to her twins as IVF twins. I don't think I will tell anyone in the group that my boys are IVF boys. Don't get me wrong all the gals seem really nice but was that really information that needed to be passed around that way?

I did manage to meet a few gals and we are going to meet next week. It will be nice to get out of the house. After suffering through IF for so many years our friends are not at the same place in life that we are so I am needing to make some new friends that have children. Not that I am going to dump my old friends, although a few have 'dumped' us already. I guess life changes when you have small kids, oh well I wouldn't change it for the world.

I have been struggling to find my balance. I am not sure that I am doing what I need to do to be a good parent and that is so important to me. Not that I have to be the best parent I just want to be a pretty good one. I really haven't got a network to help me out. (Hopefully that will come soon). I feel like I have spent so much time avoiding kids and kid issues and people with kids that I don't really know what I am doing. I am struggling with feeding and what to do and keeping the boys busy. I feel guilty when I am cleaning if they are awake. I don't suppose I have to play with them all the time when they are awake, but I am just worried I am not playing with them enough. I guess that is part of parenting - worrying.

Anyway that's all I have to say today...


At 7:21 p.m., March 09, 2006, Anonymous Lori said...

Yikes you have been getting a lot of snow lately. I hope spring shows up soon.
As for the transition issues - I worry about that on occassion. I've avoided anything child related for so long that if we ever are lucky, I won't have a clue what to do.
I hope your able to create a good network for yourself.

At 10:19 p.m., March 09, 2006, Blogger TiggleBitties said...

Please don't feel like you should have to hide the fact that your boys are "IVF twins." If people can't get past that or feel as if somehow your boys are less than their kids, then screw them! Seriously. Though I don't have children yet, I can imagine what it must be like going through the transition period. As all things, it will take time, pretty soon this will seem like old hat! Once you weed out the friendly's from the non-friendly's, your network will start to create itself. Good Luck!

At 4:46 p.m., March 14, 2006, Blogger Katie said...

I found your blog today through googleblog's search for parenting twins. My boys are 2, and are clomid babies. I had to comment on that insensitive woman's idea that children conceived through ART are somehow less than children whose parents are lucky enough to not need help becoming pregnant. Braving the waters of IF and going to the extreme physical and emotional pain of IVF should be a badge of honor. It shouldn't be seen as a sign of weakness that we can't conceive our children without help, but a sign of how desperately those children are wanted. Keep your head high, and know that your sons will never wonder if you really wanted them.


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